Summer Solstice

How did you spend your day today? I participated in the SISTERHIVE Summer Solstice gathering, grounding with Mother Earth and took a sea salt bubble bath.

While journaling this morning, setting my intention, I was called to write this.

Tending the fire
I sit quietly
Gazing at the flames as they dance
I realize that I am like the sparks scattering in the night sky
As quickly as I come into being
I disappear into the cosmos







What's your Symbol?

I remember back in the day THE question was “what’s your sign”. My question these days is what’s your symbol. In working with soul art you put yourself out onto the canvas, expressing yourself, your spirit, your emotions through color and symbols. Remember when you used to doodle on your pee-chee folder (yeah, going WAY BACK) . . . . wish I could take a look back. I do remember writing over and over and over again I Love Fred Brecht, ha ha ha ha.

I find myself always putting a spiral in my journal, my art and my website!! Yesterday as I was putzing around the house I discovered three items that have spirals, two of which I have had for YEARS. The rug has seen better days but I just couldn’t bring myself to part with it, ahhh, now I know why! Same with the napkin ring holders that I never use!

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I’ve associated the spiral with community, connection but this morning I found this meaning which RESONATES with me!

The Spiral is a sacred symbol that represents the journey and change of life as it unfolds; taking a labyrinth-like passage that leads to Source. The spiral symbol can represent the consciousness of nature beginning from its center expanding outwardly .

So tell me, what’s YOUR symbol?

Grounding Tools

I’ve been feeling on edge and loopy last couple of days. Dealing with a dispute through PayPal and we are in an endless loop, I had some negative energy that was stuck, mine and others, and I haven’t been grounding myself lately which inspired me to write this post this morning.

What I’ve been feeling, agitated, scattered, body not able to relax, monkey mind. Sound familiar?

Here are some tools I use to get myself back into a calm flow state. Sometimes, like this morning, I need to use several if not ALL my tools, lol

Sage. I love using the sage spray as it’s easy to use, smells wonderful and safer, lol, as I tend to get loopy and forget things.

A “worry” stone or any rock (thank you, Amy, for reminding me!). I used to carry the brecciate jasper worry stone with me all the time during Richard’s illness. When I felt stressed, angry, scared I would reach into my back and rub my fingers across the stone, very calming, quieted the mind. Any rock will do, a piece of Mother Earth.

Grounding and/or Cutting Cords meditation. I use Insight Timer. And if you can, do the grounding meditation outside, connect your body to Mother Earth, lean up against a tree, lay on the grass . . .

Putting your hands in cold water (thank you, Amy!) I didn’t heat the pool this year, I’m thinking a dive into the pool would work!!

Most importantly BREATHE. Focus on your breath. There are several different techniques, counting, mantras to help you concentrate on your breath.

Namaste!!

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Work In Progress

My three rays this morning, powerful! Gold, Peach & Opal rays. I get these a lot. To find my balance, my spiritual freedom , finding my divine purpose, fulfillment, joy, is through transformation, rebirth. A journey I started in August of 2017. The path is smoother now, less twists and turns, portals have been entered, childhood wounds healed, cords cuts, fears conquered. I used to think of my destination, my medicine as my goal. I still do but not as much. I am trying to live in the PRESENT, it is a gift. I smile more, I am friendlier to strangers, I laugh and talk to them. Sometimes they just start sharing their stories. I've had strangers look at me with a knowing in their eyes, I can feel their spirit.

If you have wondered about your spiritual path, your purpose, your voice, I’m here to witness you! Please feel free to send me a message!

I started this piece I think sometime in early 2018. I pulled it out of the WIP stash and decided to rework it.

If you are interested in learning more about rays and energy work please click here Energy Medicine Institute

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Soul Agreement

The canvas I used was a painting I did the day before Richard's first chemo session. I did not like it and put it in the closet.  It sat there for 20 months until I took Shiloh Sophia’s Midnight Muse session!

The process was so cathartic, painting over what was on the canvas, releasing, shedding tears and fears, letting go of one chapter of of my life, beginning a new one.  

What I learned through my grieving and healing was that Richard and I had a soul contract from birth (the minute I saw Richard I knew he was THE ONE!) Richard's purpose in this life was to help me become a better person, to find my soul truth, through his illness and passing.  It was at this time that I started questioning why I was here on earth, turning to God and giving it all up to him, beginning my spiritual path, my OWN spiritual path.  

The symbols.  The red thread (which came out of the compost) binds our souls.  The hand and heart represent my sending him my love everyday.  The feather presents the feather I found on my kitchen floor the night after my first visitation from Richard. The light represents the energy I see and feel.  Finding and sharing my voice is the ray of light through the face into my throat. 

I am so amazed at how it all come out on the canvas. I did not plan it. It revealed itself to me. What a beautiful experience, transformation!!!!

This is what Intentional Creativity is! I will be teaching my first IC class sometime this Fall! Can’t wait to share the process with you!


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Deep Soul Heart


The Way Home

Lately my dreams have become very weird, vivid.  I try to document them the minute I wake up, some times it is easier than others.  Many I still don’t understand their meaning but this morning’s dream I do KNOW!

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TRUST

You Are On Your Path

Richard and I were driving over winding, narrow dirt roads, lava, I could see the embers, large black boulders, very bumpy terrain.  We came to a clearing and I understood this was Richard’s stop, his destination. 

A kind, young woman greeted us.  I asked her, how do I get home?  I don’t want to go the way I came.  She said, you can go this way, it’s smoother. There was NO road, only air.  I said my car can’t fly, how do I get there.  She said to just wait for a few minutes the road was being built.  As I looked I could see something that looked like an island floating in the middle of the vastness of the air and the road appearing but it hadn’t quite reached the land yet.  I asked her if it would take me all the way home as I knew the island was not my final destination.  She said, NOT YET, that I had to wait there at the island and the road would be built when it was time!

Working Through My Grief

For the first time in I don’t know how long I woke up with a light heart, a smile, feeling happy and ready to embrace my day!

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Mantra

Face Your Fears, Trust the Journey

My journey began 21 months ago, well, to be honest, a bit before that, but that’s when my life changed, the rug was pulled out, I passed out on the emergency room floor, “Come grow old with me, the best is yet to be” printed on our wedding invitation was not going to be.

I remember going to Richard’s primary doctor after his diagnosis. I made an appointment for the both of us. I was prescribed Ativan and Lexapro to help ease the monkey mind and take the edge off. I was hesitant. I am one that does not like to take medications. After discussion with the doctor, close friends and family who have also taken these meds I said okay BUT I knew that I needed more. I needed a spiritual tool kit.

I signed up for a Stress Management class offered through Sutter Health. I looked into Energy Healing and found a wonderful mentor, Naomi. I found many guides to help me on my path through online groups. I should probably expand on those but I’ll be honest, I’m lazy, ha ha, that’s too much to document but I do post about my groups here on this blog. I learned to pray differently. My relationship with my truth teller, God, changed.

I am healing and growing AND I am no longer taking the medications prescribed for me! They helped get me through those sleepless nights, calm down the anxiety. I knew it was time to wean myself off of them, that I have my spiritual tool belt and guides and my tribe to lean on.

BUT my new tools some may consider woo-woo so I was not sharing. People would say to me, wow, you are so strong, you are doing so well and I wanted to share why but I held back, I wasn’t speaking my truth, my voice.

Slowly I started stepping into my own, my voice, thus this blog. But I wasn’t posting much, still hiding. What are you afraid of?!?!? That family and friends may judge me?!

Those old beliefs and patterns are binding, they don’t allow us to grow and be the person we are meant to be.

This week, after the Fly Free Retreat, I took the first step in sharing my voice, posting on my personal FB page.

Part of my path is I want YOU to be who you are meant to be. How can I do that if I don’t share!?!?!

Face YOUR fears, TRUST the JOURNEY!!!




Fly Free Retreat

What a WONDERFUL weekend I spent with my Soul Sisters!! Fly Free Retreat was hosted by Shannon and Sandi of Soul Chicks and Kolleen Harrison

The retreat started with being greeted outside as I drove up! The personal touches meant so much. From the moment I stepped out of the car “real” life took a backseat and I was incased in a love bubble (soul chick speak)

Friday started off with an amazing dinner with views of the vineyard where strangers quickly became old friends. Our day began on Saturday with mindful yoga, followed by journaling, soul searching, sharing and witnessing. Our beautiful retreat came to an end on Sunday morning with a great breakfast, hugs and tears, our hearts full and a bonding of soul sistars that will not be broken!

If you want to be part of this sisterhood and restore yourself please visit Soul Chicks page to learn more about Shannon and Sandi and sign up for their newsletter!

I’ll let the pictures speak for the weekend . . . . .



Who Am I

I am a daughter of Frank and Julia

I am a sister

I am an aunt, a great aunt and a great-great aunt

I am a widow

I am a friend

those are the first things that come to mind BUT those are LABELS!

I AM so much more than that.

I am a gift from God

I am funny

I am strong

I am smart enough

I am good enough

I am worthy

I am loved

I am YOU and YOU are me

And what I just learned is

I am a free spirit that has been struggling to show herself but FEAR clipped my wings a long, long time ago.

Would I have spread my wings I would have been a Renaissance Woman, a photographer traveling the world, a writer, a healer, an artist living abroad.

I am not going to say I’m too old.

I am going to say

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I am growing my wings

I will fly free