Discernment

This word is shouting at me this morning so much so that I had to pull out my journal AND then I was told, no, pull out your laptop.

So what does this word mean. I hear it a lot in the webinars I attend, living a soul aligned life, finding your path, your purpose, collaborations with spirit, discernment.

Without looking the word up what comes to mind is knowing the difference between what is right and what is wrong, but it is more than a knowing, it is a “feeling” a knowing deep down inside.

Now, I’ll google it and see what the “dictionary” says it is.

the ability to judge well.

"an astonishing lack of discernment"

(in Christian contexts) perception in the absence of judgment with a view to obtaining spiritual guidance and understanding.

"without providing for a time of healing and discernment, there will be no hope of living through this present moment without a shattering of our common life"

Ha, ha, is that clear as mud to you? So according to Merriam-Webster


1: the quality of being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure : skill in discerning

2: an act of perceiving or discerning something

Now I think I’m getting a better picture of what the meaning of discernment is for me. I’ve been struggling with why am I here. If you’ve read some of my previous posts you will know what started this journey.

With my move I have been really off kilter. I have my soul chick sisters and my bee hive sisters and they all offer me support in different ways but what I just realized was my strength comes from within ME, my spiritual self and that has not been listened to lately and WHEN I do listen to it I “doubt” what I’m hearing.

. . . . being able to grasp and comprehend what is obscure, act of perceiving or “discerning” something . . . that “little voice” that my dad always told me to listen to.

Whenever that little voice speaks to me, sometimes it’s really loud, I feel it’s truth within, my heart knows it is so, but my head intervenes. Ah, discernment!!!! I can see this is going to take some time for me to work through but that little voice is becoming louder and louder. Don’ shy away from speaking your voice, share what you believe in, it is what makes you uniquely you, It is time to shine your LIGHT!

I often rush to get to the answer, the destination, it’s been over two years and just now I think I understand what discernment is and what it means for me. Now . . . . . will I really LISTEN with my heart?!?!? The journey is beginning anew . . . . continuing . . . . it’s never-ending.


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A little zen corner in my old home . . . the spiral . . . . . the journey . . . . .

New Beginnings

Last week I started a post and I loved how it was flowing and then I accidentally deleted it. Don’t you hate when that happens. There was no way I could recapture what I had shared.

Two weeks ago I moved into my new home. I sold my home that Richard and I bought together, spent our entire married life in. It was such an emotional time but I never doubted that I was doing the right thing, that advice don’t make any hasty decisions for awhile, wait at least a year, BUT when the universe speaks, LISTEN.


I knew I could not stay in the Lennox house, financially, emotionally and a 2300 square foot home for just Sophie and me.

On a whim, or was it, I’ve been asking for guidance, praying, I searched “waterfront” home. Yeah, a girl can dream. But what popped up surprised me, Discovery Bay. Not too far from where I lived and closer to family. I saw a condo that I really liked and once again I did something I would never do, put in my info knowing a real estate agent would contact me. Yep, shortly after entering my name I received an email. I explained my situation, I was just testing the waters, ha ha ha, and although I knew where Discovery Bay was I was not familiar with the area. He suggested we meet and he would show me around. I called my younger sister and told her and she was so excited, YES, I’ll go with you!

Little did I know how much my life was going to change. We checked out some places in Discovery Bay but Don suggested we go check out a 55 plus community in Brentwood. He felt it would be a much better fit for me, lots of activities especially as I was moving somewhere where I knew no one.

The first house we walked into I KNEW this was my home. I saw myself living there. The light that streamed in through the kitchen, the colors of the walls and the tile floor, 45 days later I am writing from my bedroom, looking out the window seeing the sun rise. There is a walking path and an orchard behind me, so peaceful.

I put my trust in people I did not know but I do KNOW they were brought into my life to help me with this transition. TRUST and SURRENDER. Not easy but I knew I had to in order to make this happen.

When I was packing I found an envelope that said “open when you move into your new home”. I thought I had written myself a letter but it was’t. It was a manifestation what do I want to be, what do I want to do, what do I want to have. Ha ha one of them was blogger extraordinaire. Well, a girl can dream . . . may not exactly be extraordinaire but if I can help just one person, be an inspiration to just one person, then I have fulfilled another one of the things I wrote down, what type of person are you, and I wrote inspirational as one of them, the other two were resilient and loyal.

Well, it is time to start a new day, one filled with new adventures and unpacking MORE BOXES! This home is only 1200 square feet and although I sold about 80 percent of my furniture, even my bed, I have way too much STUFF, and am now weeding through it. I am excited that there is someone here in the community who does interior design and we are going to be working on getting the second bedroom all set up as my art studio, totally rustic!! I will be sharing this with you!

Have a wonderful day! TRUST and SURRENDER! LISTEN!!!





Summer Solstice

How did you spend your day today? I participated in the SISTERHIVE Summer Solstice gathering, grounding with Mother Earth and took a sea salt bubble bath.

While journaling this morning, setting my intention, I was called to write this.

Tending the fire
I sit quietly
Gazing at the flames as they dance
I realize that I am like the sparks scattering in the night sky
As quickly as I come into being
I disappear into the cosmos







What's your Symbol?

I remember back in the day THE question was “what’s your sign”. My question these days is what’s your symbol. In working with soul art you put yourself out onto the canvas, expressing yourself, your spirit, your emotions through color and symbols. Remember when you used to doodle on your pee-chee folder (yeah, going WAY BACK) . . . . wish I could take a look back. I do remember writing over and over and over again I Love Fred Brecht, ha ha ha ha.

I find myself always putting a spiral in my journal, my art and my website!! Yesterday as I was putzing around the house I discovered three items that have spirals, two of which I have had for YEARS. The rug has seen better days but I just couldn’t bring myself to part with it, ahhh, now I know why! Same with the napkin ring holders that I never use!

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I’ve associated the spiral with community, connection but this morning I found this meaning which RESONATES with me!

The Spiral is a sacred symbol that represents the journey and change of life as it unfolds; taking a labyrinth-like passage that leads to Source. The spiral symbol can represent the consciousness of nature beginning from its center expanding outwardly .

So tell me, what’s YOUR symbol?

Grounding Tools

I’ve been feeling on edge and loopy last couple of days. Dealing with a dispute through PayPal and we are in an endless loop, I had some negative energy that was stuck, mine and others, and I haven’t been grounding myself lately which inspired me to write this post this morning.

What I’ve been feeling, agitated, scattered, body not able to relax, monkey mind. Sound familiar?

Here are some tools I use to get myself back into a calm flow state. Sometimes, like this morning, I need to use several if not ALL my tools, lol

Sage. I love using the sage spray as it’s easy to use, smells wonderful and safer, lol, as I tend to get loopy and forget things.

A “worry” stone or any rock (thank you, Amy, for reminding me!). I used to carry the brecciate jasper worry stone with me all the time during Richard’s illness. When I felt stressed, angry, scared I would reach into my back and rub my fingers across the stone, very calming, quieted the mind. Any rock will do, a piece of Mother Earth.

Grounding and/or Cutting Cords meditation. I use Insight Timer. And if you can, do the grounding meditation outside, connect your body to Mother Earth, lean up against a tree, lay on the grass . . .

Putting your hands in cold water (thank you, Amy!) I didn’t heat the pool this year, I’m thinking a dive into the pool would work!!

Most importantly BREATHE. Focus on your breath. There are several different techniques, counting, mantras to help you concentrate on your breath.

Namaste!!

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Work In Progress

My three rays this morning, powerful! Gold, Peach & Opal rays. I get these a lot. To find my balance, my spiritual freedom , finding my divine purpose, fulfillment, joy, is through transformation, rebirth. A journey I started in August of 2017. The path is smoother now, less twists and turns, portals have been entered, childhood wounds healed, cords cuts, fears conquered. I used to think of my destination, my medicine as my goal. I still do but not as much. I am trying to live in the PRESENT, it is a gift. I smile more, I am friendlier to strangers, I laugh and talk to them. Sometimes they just start sharing their stories. I've had strangers look at me with a knowing in their eyes, I can feel their spirit.

If you have wondered about your spiritual path, your purpose, your voice, I’m here to witness you! Please feel free to send me a message!

I started this piece I think sometime in early 2018. I pulled it out of the WIP stash and decided to rework it.

If you are interested in learning more about rays and energy work please click here Energy Medicine Institute

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Soul Agreement

The canvas I used was a painting I did the day before Richard's first chemo session. I did not like it and put it in the closet.  It sat there for 20 months until I took Shiloh Sophia’s Midnight Muse session!

The process was so cathartic, painting over what was on the canvas, releasing, shedding tears and fears, letting go of one chapter of of my life, beginning a new one.  

What I learned through my grieving and healing was that Richard and I had a soul contract from birth (the minute I saw Richard I knew he was THE ONE!) Richard's purpose in this life was to help me become a better person, to find my soul truth, through his illness and passing.  It was at this time that I started questioning why I was here on earth, turning to God and giving it all up to him, beginning my spiritual path, my OWN spiritual path.  

The symbols.  The red thread (which came out of the compost) binds our souls.  The hand and heart represent my sending him my love everyday.  The feather presents the feather I found on my kitchen floor the night after my first visitation from Richard. The light represents the energy I see and feel.  Finding and sharing my voice is the ray of light through the face into my throat. 

I am so amazed at how it all come out on the canvas. I did not plan it. It revealed itself to me. What a beautiful experience, transformation!!!!

This is what Intentional Creativity is! I will be teaching my first IC class sometime this Fall! Can’t wait to share the process with you!


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Deep Soul Heart


The Way Home

Lately my dreams have become very weird, vivid.  I try to document them the minute I wake up, some times it is easier than others.  Many I still don’t understand their meaning but this morning’s dream I do KNOW!

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TRUST

You Are On Your Path

Richard and I were driving over winding, narrow dirt roads, lava, I could see the embers, large black boulders, very bumpy terrain.  We came to a clearing and I understood this was Richard’s stop, his destination. 

A kind, young woman greeted us.  I asked her, how do I get home?  I don’t want to go the way I came.  She said, you can go this way, it’s smoother. There was NO road, only air.  I said my car can’t fly, how do I get there.  She said to just wait for a few minutes the road was being built.  As I looked I could see something that looked like an island floating in the middle of the vastness of the air and the road appearing but it hadn’t quite reached the land yet.  I asked her if it would take me all the way home as I knew the island was not my final destination.  She said, NOT YET, that I had to wait there at the island and the road would be built when it was time!